Wednesday, November 3, 2010

an animal that is trying to prove

1 comment:

  1. Hey Abhishek,
    I think rephrasing your sentences to make them shorter might help to engage the concentration of viewers/readers.
    I got lost quite a few times while reading the slides.
    I noticed you put in a lot of effort to rhyme the sentences but sometimes every alternate sentence need not rhyme. You could switch up the structure and rhyme every two or three lines.
    Also i think in your head the concept of your poem is strong but in the persuit of delivering the message a little of the strength got lost. Maybe you should have another go at it.
    The visuals were appealing and the contrast looks simple and great!
    the font you've chosen is apt as it gives the poem a personal touch.